Birthday Pancakes (our family tradition)

Dearest BigBoy,

My heart swells with pride and overflows with love every time I see you. You are a very special little boy. Last week you turned seven. I can hardly believe it. Seven. Every parent says the time goes so quickly and now I say it too. What a wonderful big boy you’ve become.

As a first grader (omg!!!), you are a super student. You now read very well and enjoy reading books. I giggled with delight after I “caught” you reading books in your closet last night when you should have been in bed. Having you read to me is a life’s treasure. You ace your math quizzes and almost always get your bonus spelling words correct. This has me beaming with parental pride. The best part of being your parent is always hearing how kind and polite you are in the classroom and when you go to other people’s homes. Thank you, thank you my little lovely! Hearing those words from other adults are like the angels singing to me.

This year you’ve really matured. You can now hang with the bigger kids on our block without crying or having meltdowns, and I hear that you can hold your own on the playground playing tetherball. While you are still a boy that deeply feels his feelings you keep them in check and let it go when it’s appropriate to do so. I respect your desire and need for “talk to myself time” (your down time) as wish I did that more for myself. I love when you confide in me and we get to talk things out together. I look forward to many more years of helping support you through life’s challenges.

Teaching Mom How to Drive at Autotopia at Disneyland

You have been a valuable teacher to me. Putting things very plainly and often with your kooky sense of humor, you have been a comfort and joy when I really needed it. One of the most favorite things that you say to me when I get stressed because your little brother is freaking out and things just aren’t going my way, you have on numerous occasions rubbed my arm and said, “Mom, I know it’s hard to be a parent. It will be okay.” Sometimes that’s precisely the reset that I need.

This past year you and Daddy have begun Adventure Guides through the YMCA. It is teaching you to be brave and a good young man. While this is excellent father-son bonding time, a friendship with Paolito has also been a wonderful gift of your manly camping weekends.

Brave Buddies at Adventure Guides

You and your buddies, Paolito, Reece, and Adrian, are all about Bey Blades (and you’ve even re-recruited some of the older kids on the block to play again!). You talk endlessly about the performance tips, energy rings and battle characteristics of all of the blades. You save your $2 allowance each week to buy your next favorite battler. I think you are a bit obsessed, but you play with such passion and save your money so well, that it’s delightful to see you scream,”3-2-1 Let It Rip!!!” You are kind and inclusive to your little brother such that it is a joy to see you two play together so well. BabyD admires you so.

The big gift this last Christmas was Wii Skylanders. Though your fixation on Bey Blades has yet to wane, you and your frieds are all about the different virtual characters of Skylander and I’m pretty awesome at Stealth Elf, if I do say so myself. I look forward to seeing your collection grow.

You are fun, playful, joyous and full of goodness. I am so proud to be your Mommy. Keep up the great work. Happy 7th year my BigBoy. Know that you are loved.

Your Mom,

Not Just Another Jen

I love them. I hate them. I love them. And I'm DAMN proud to be the 4th sister!

An ode to woman for which you shouldn’t be surprised
Because we come from the same cloth, Shane Parmely, you and I.

We are true sisters from a long away tribe
that had feistiness and spriteliness and goddess inside.
For you see my all of me, the warts and beauty within
you bring out my sexiness and happiness and skin!

For you, I am greatful* and thrilled that we’re friends,
but truly I know we are sisters of kin.

And your sisters are my sisters and friends of friends
For when we are together, may the good times never end!
For you are a very happy spot in my life
That is forever truthful and mighty and I take in stride

But one thing’s for sure and will not deny
You are my sista sista
and friend
you and I

Inspired by the outrageous group of women at Sister Anna’s Palm Spring 1^st Annual Bachelorette Party.  Cheers ladies and friends of friends!

*yes, goddammit I know I misspelled the word

Mom & I playing Betty Homemaker - Christmas 2009

On this Thursday, I knew exactly what I was thankful for.  I didn’t even have to think about it. I’m thankful for my Mommy.  She lives in Colorado and we don’t get the opportunity to see each other more than twice a year typically.

Right now my life is a bit crazy; working from home, not keeping house, keeping up with the boys their toys and playdates, my playdates and keeping my relationship going strong (I don’t want to lose this great momentum that we’ve created!).  AND BigBoy’s 6^th birthday is this weekend.  AND I’m doing a vision board party next weekend.  AND my back is out of wack, I still need to work out, and I’m trying not to stress to the max.  But here I am all over myself and all over you.  Sorry.

Well, my Mom is here.  My house is dirty.  She don’t care.  I barely have anything yet for BigBoy’s party. We need to do some work in the back yard. But don’t worry…my Mom is here.  And she’s happy to help.  And she’s got a great attitude.  And she gives hugs too.

No one else in the world can take care of you like your Mom.  My Mom is sooo taking care of me right now. I AM SO THANKFUL.  Cuz clearly I need some help.  I’m in the weeds a bit over my head.  If I can keep telling myself, “one thing at a time,” keep breathing, “it’ll be okay,” and knowing that my Mom is here helping me…then this weekend is going to be great.

I just need to remember to keep breathing, saying thank you, and having faith it will get done.  And what won’t get done will be okay.

Ok?

Ok.

Thanks Mom!  I love you and I’m so glad you’re here.

Let me start by saying I love my neighbors.  Patty & Bruce are exactly the neighbors you would want when you move into a new neighborhood.  They are about 10 years our senior, their son went off to college a few years ago and they live a beautiful life.  Patty creates beauty in everything she touches – her garden (which I so thankfully look at often), her cooking (and baking and hosting) is phenomenal and her great community of wonderful women is inspiring.  When we moved here they threw a block party to introduce us to our other neighbors.  They are awesome, don’t cha think?

Well, I mentioned Patty’s community of friends.  I’ve met a number of her girlfriends through the years, at parties and in passing.  You can tell that they are a tight knit group of fun gals – some empty nesters, many with kids at home, all looking good and feeling great as they move gracefully through their late 40s and into their 50s.  Patty and many of her friends are even do-gooders dedicated to the Susan G. Komen Walk for a Cure, raised a shit load of money last year and did the 60-mile walk. They put their money, heart and soul into a worthy cause together.  And they’ve done it before and they’ll surely do it again.  Anyway, I look up to these gals knowing that they are spending some of their best years of their life together.  Watching each others’ kids go through school, playing sports, celebrating holidays together, sometimes even sharing family vacations.  Being friends and families together through the years.

Yesterday, I heard that one of Patty & Bruce’s dearest friends passed away.  Mike McElroy, 53, father of 3, fit and a good man was walking up Paint Mountain with his wife Susan, like they do many times a week.  Got to the top, looked up at her with a half smile, sat down, laid down and turned blue.  He died.  Right there in front of her.  Patty was one of the first people Susan called.  Patty was there when the kids came home from school and Susan had to tell them that their dad won’t be coming back.

Yep.

Susan is the tall, pretty one of Patty’s friends.  She’s the kind of woman that you say, “Wow, I hope I look as good as she does when I turn 50.”  Together, Mike and Susan have three children – two boys, aged 13 and 11, and one girl, 8 years old.  My heart breaks for that family.  For how they are falling apart right now and realizing that their family will never be the same.  My heart is breaking for Susan that she has lost her partner and husband with whom she created a beautiful and picture perfect life.  My heart is breaking for those kids who have lost not only their father, but their hero and friend.

My heart goes out to Patty and Bruce because this will rock them and their community.  Mike was 53.  That’s so incredibly young to up and have a heart attack. And die.  Right there.  While hiking with his wife on a hike that they did all the time. That’s got to grab your collar of mortality and look you in the face (particularly for men of a certain age).  And Mike was healthy and fit.  He was active and ate well.  He was involved with his children, coached their sports teams, picked them up from school.  Now he’s not.  Just like that.  It doesn’t seem right.

Now The McElroy’s community and extended family are shaken, but holding steady.  Their arms are big and wide.  Holding them.  Feeding them.  Crying with them.

And it’s in these moments that I hold my babies just a little bit tighter.  Look my husband in the eyes and squeeze his hand.  And tell my friends that I love them. I am deeply thankful for my family, but I know that it’s friends that tell the story of our lives.  Friends will hold the McElroy’s through this time.  So thank you to my dear family of friends because it’s you who witness my life and the life of my family.  You are ones that will hold me through the happiest and most tragic times.  Thank you for being there.  You know who you are.

Cheers.

Added Sat., January 15———-

Patty sent this to me via email.  She has given permission to post it here.

Please check out these other lovelies by clicking their blog buttons.

Hubs teaching BigBoy to ride a bike

What an awesome moment!  As always check out our friends that host Wordless Wednesday link ups.  Cheers Friends!

Davis Family Reunion 2010 - Vallecito Lake, CO

Usually I participate in Wordless Wednesdays posts.  However, while looking at my pictures, I realized that there is one picture that I need to write about.  Earlier this month I attended my extended family’s biennial reunion.  This year, my Mom and I hosted the gathering at a lakeside set of cabins in southwest Colorado.  I should put in a friendly mention to Burt & Pat at the Bear Paw Lodge in Vallecito Lake, CO.  Their place was just lovely and they were delightful to work with.  (Thank you Pat & Burt!)

This extended family is who I spent my summers growing up with.  These are the people that have known me before I was born, all through my dance recitals, all through puberty and my boy crazy stage, into college, into and out of a bad marriage, and into a good one and now my life as a mom.  They know me.  They’ve known me a long time coming and they’ll know me a long time going.

These wonderful people knew my dear and beloved Grammy.  They played countless hours of cards with her, shared endless meals and stories with her, laughed with her, buried three brothers with her, held her hand, and finally buried her too.

It is an amazing thing to me when you have gone through life with a group of people and every great once in a while you come together to reunite, to share a meal and to create a warmhearted memory.  I appreciate the on-going love and respect that we have for each other.  Some of us are very different, but we move toward the things that bring us together on this one weekend every other year — the stories and pictures that we share;  the helpful hugs and advice (especially on parenting and marriage!); the good cheer;  and the damn fine bar-b-que (thank you Billy & Jackie!)

We came from all ends of the United States to share a weekend together and I love that.  There was very little drama, but whole lotta competition on the washers (kinda like horseshoes).  And there is always lots of love (and food!) to go around.

Thank you my Davis Family!  I hope you treasure the time together that we spent as much as I do and yes, I’ll get that slideshow up, “Uncle” Barry!  Cheers!

This is my Grammy, sometime in the 1940s

I love Wordless Wednesdays.  Thank you Angry Julie and Red Lotus Mama for the big share.  You gals are awesome!

DAY 1 (Wednesday):  I swear it takes me eight hours to pack the three of us.  Wednesday afternoon (yeah, late start) the boys and I drove from our home in San Diego to St. George, Utah (first stop).  The van was packed with snacks, activities, and (thank goodness) BigBoy’s Leapster.  We made the quickie, four-hour trip to Vegas.  I thought it would be cool to get out and eat on The Strip.  We found an easy-access Denny’s near public parking.  On our two-block walk we saw Jack Sparrow, Edward Cullen, and Wonder Woman.  I love Las Vegas.  I also love people watching all the tourists and party whores.

Three hours from Las Vegas to get to St. George, Utah where we spent our first night. Overall, the boys did a fantastic job in the car.  BigBoy could see the clock on the dash and he knew not to keep asking me how much longer it will it be to get there because I just kept saying, “What time did I say?”  In his exasperated voice, “I know Mom! You said 7:00.”  I simply replied, “Well, dude, nothing’s changed.”  End of discussion.  That works for me.

NotJustAnotherJen & the boys - Salt Wash, UT

I’m surprised by how many people are astonished that I’m travelling alone with two little ones.  Husband’s working and I like our separate vacations.  We’ll meet up next week at my parents’ house for our family reunion. I like being with the boys, especially when we’re out of our regular routine.  I tell them that we’re on this adventure together and that we need to look out for each other.  BigBoy has been incredibly helpful, more so than he ever is at home.  BabyD still sleeps in his crib at home, but on the trip I’m forgoing the pack-n-play and having the boys sleep together.  The boys are creating a special, brotherly bond, which is so charming to watch.  And yes, BabyD fell out of the bed twice and I barely got any sleep because I thought he’d roll out again, but it’s okay.  I’m on vacation.  I’m just happy to be here (wherever here is).

Watch the road!

DAY 2 (Thursday):  The next destination was Castle Rock, Colorado where my brother and his wife live.  The boys are so very excited to see their cousins.  This leg of the trip was a 10-hour drive through some of the most incredible landscape in the United States (at least what I’ve seen of the U.S.).  Utah is an extraordinarily beautiful state.  We’re definitely coming back for a family vacation.  We made a pit stop at Salt Wash, Utah and climbed rocks and killed ants.  The picture on the right was taken while driving.  (I know, don’t yell at me!  But look, it is astonishingly beautiful.)

We were in Silt, Colorado (what a name!) when BabyD had a shit storm.  I pulled over at the (I kid you not) the Kum & Go.  What is it about Pull-Ups that doesn’t contain the poop?  It goes out the side, down the leg and into the shoes.  Ugh.  I had a trail of poop from the car to the wash room in the nasty stop of the Kum & Go.  The whole place was like a trashy truck stop, complete with a tattooed drunk couple yelling at each other out front.  Oh lord, the whole scene was NASTY, as you might imagine with a name like the Kum & Go (sorry, had to say it again).  I really needed a drink after that but settled for a Starbucks.  We had three and a half more hours to go.

The road from Silt was out of this world.  We travelled along side the Colorado River on Interstate 70 passing through Aspen, Vail, and Breckenridge.  I’ve never skied there, but can see why it’s such a big deal.  During the summer when the river is high, people are fly fishing and biking around.  The soaring, red mountains are breathtaking.  It was astounding.  Eventually it began to rain hard and get dark, so coming down the mountain into the Denver area was a white-knuckling experience with the steep grades and large semis, but we made it.  I had to yell at tell the boys to “zip it!” a good number of times, but they know when Mommy’s starting to stress, not to push my buttons.

My brother and his family are in a new huge, gorgeous model home (moved in on the day of my arrival…more on that later), which is also amazing.  They are up on a breathtaking ridge with the grand Rockies framed perfectly in every window of the house.

I love the West.  I love the rich, deep colors.  I love the heat.  I love that I’m sharing this with my boys who are just starting to be at the age to appreciate it.  We’ll be here through July 4^th then on to my parent home in Durango, Colorado on Monday.  The following weekend we have a family reunion that we’ve been preparing for months.  I can’t wait to share the West with the rest of them.

Right now, I’m going to relish the beauty around me and keep my vacation frame of mind, especially when there are so many kids screaming, yelling and enjoying each other.  Thankfully, Heather and I will get our girly-fill of margaritas and Eclipse tonight.  Cheers to family and summer fun.

NOTE: I wanted to post this earlier, but they still don’t have internet connectivity at the house.  More to come.